Find the right time and place – somewhere the young person feels safe and relaxed. Ensure you won’t be interrupted. Let them know you are not there to judge them.

Listen
Don’t expect or demand them to talk. If they do, be patient and try not to react badly to what they tell you. Let them have the voice in this conversation.

Encourage them to share their fears

And, where appropriate, share your own fears – tell them how much you worry about their safety and their future.

Be positive

Reassure them that the vast majority of young people don’t carry knives. If they are scared of someone or something, tell them it can be dealt with without the need for them to carry a knife.

Stick to the facts

Prepare well and know your facts. You will gain credibility in their eyes if you sound knowledgeable and clued-up. Our facts page tells you all you need to know about knife crime.

Reassure them that most young people don’t carry a knife

The latest research from London shows that in a room of 100 young people, just two of them would be carrying a knife. Encourage your child not to stand out from the crowd.

Be clear about false ‘bravery’

Emphasise that if someone pulls a knife on them, the safest, wisest and bravest thing to do is to walk away. Children fear backlash and being targeted by a wider group for not stepping up to a situation or individual. Remind them that this moment will pass and attention will move away from them in time. Standing their ground can have lasting, devastating consequences.

Explore excuses

Think about stories your child can use to walk away from potentially risky situations. They might have to pick up their little brother, or arrange for you to call them if they send you a message.

The impact

If they were to be stabbed, who else would be affected by that? Help them to think through what would happen and the impact on others, such as their siblings, parents and friends.

Make it relevant

Refer to recent news stories or local events. You can use some of our stories to help bring this topic home. Also, try to make yourself relevant to the conversation, as it’s likely the young person will think you are old and out-of-touch and have no idea about the challenges they face. Are there examples you can draw on from your own childhood or personal experience? You might want to share your own fears about their safety and their future. Tell them that even when they feel they don’t have choices, they do. 

Suggest alternatives

Tell them about fun, safe activities for young people in the area.

If you learn some worrying things about the young person, try not to react badly. You could end up pushing them away. Use the conversation to help them understand the risks and consequences – they could go to prison for life, or end up dead themselves. If you believe they have actually used a knife on someone, you must report it. Better that they end up in trouble with the law now than injured or killed later.

Talk to the parents of your child’s friends. If you’re worried, they probably are as well. They may see your child in different places, hanging out with different friends and could help you get a better understanding of the situation. By working together you could raise awareness.

Want more help and advice? Remember you can always reach out to report and for support.

Know what knives and other items you have in the kitchen and toolbox. Check that they are all there.

Keep tabs on what is delivered to your home and look out for any online purchases. Knives can come in all shapes and sizes; recently a US company was found to be advertising on Instagram, knives disguised as lipsticks and combs – clearly aimed at young women.

Keep engaged with kids’ lives and keep an eye on their social media accounts. A lot of gang grooming and arguments that escalate into serious violence take place on social media and other online platforms.

Think about searching their bag and room – is there evidence of drugs, extra money, new clothes? Consider other hiding places.

Remember it might not be a knife, but some other weapon. 

Know where they are and who they are with.

Encourage them to hang out in safe areas wherever possible.

These are a useful list of warning signs that might indicate a young person is carrying a knife.  These are aimed mainly at parents but can be useful for anyone who comes into contact with young people.

• Have they become withdrawn from the family and/or school?
• Is their school or college reporting worrying changes in behaviour, academic achievement or attendance?
• Have they lost interest in positive activities such as sports clubs?
• Do they stay out unusually late without giving a reason and are vague about their whereabouts?
• Have they stopped seeing old friends and started hanging out with a new group?
• Are they secretive about the contents of their bag?
• Are they defensive if you ask what is in their possession or if they are hiding anything?
• Has their attitude changed about carrying knives/weapons? For example, justifying it by saying people carry them for self-defence?
• Have any items gone missing from the kitchen, tool box or garage?
• Have you found a weapon hidden amongst their possessions?

There are a number of weapons bins across the county and every knife surrendered is one less dangerous weapon in circulation on the streets of Bedfordshire.

The locations of the bins have been selected based on where there has been an increase in serious youth violence and knife crime

You can dispose of your knife at any one of the following knife bins:

• Bedford Square, Houghton Regis
• Dunstable Police Station
• Leighton Buzzard Fire Station
• Tomlinson Avenue, Luton (in the car park for St. Dominics Square)
• People’s Park, Luton (on the corner of North Street and Havelock Road)
• Just off St George’s Street, Luton (between Don Miller’s and Lloyds Bank)
• Millennium Green, Shefford
• Morrisons, St Francis Way, Shefford
• Church Lane shops, Goldington, Bedford
• Commercial Road/Costin Street, Bedford (near the basketball courts)
• St John’s Street, Kempston (in the car park opposite the Co-op)

We would advise people to ensure that the knife is wrapped up and secure as if you are stopped by a police officer, you would need to prove that you are on your way to a weapons bin to actually dispose of it, as opposed to someone who is found with a knife concealed in their clothing.

Just because the knife has been surrendered, doesn’t mean it won’t be sent off for a forensic examination. If it’s found to have been used in crime, then you will not be immune from prosecution just because you have surrendered it.